The Shame-Rage Connection

So many of us have had to deal with the issues of anger and rage in our lives due to the abuse that we suffered as children. As a youth I had some very real issues with anger and rage that profoundly affected my life and the lives of everyone around me. I spent years trying to learn to cope better with the shame, anger and rage that consumed me from the time I was a young girl. It took me years to learn to change my behaviour as I realized that my behaviour was wrong and that I truly did not want to hurt anyone. I began to repress the anger and rage deep down inside me, not allowing myself to express my anger or rage because of the abuse I suffered. This nearly destroyed me as I had no way to deal or cope with those emotions. I am now learning just how the shame-rage connection had impacted my life and learning how to cope and nurture my raging inner child. I encourage anyone who has been through this to keep looking for help, keep looking for hope and keep reaching out. Please check out the website from Dave Decker and Mike Obsatz at http://www.angeresources.com for more information regarding the shame-rage connection. Take care everyone! Keep reaching out!! YOU do count! YOU do matter!!

New Beginnings

Here is to the whole notion of starting over, a new beginning, a new chapter. This gift of freedom that has been given to me by Dreamcatchers For Abused Children, President Donna Kshir and CEO and Founder Sandra Potter has been so helpful for me in my healing journey. I am now working on a sequal, and have many other ideas for books in the near future. We survivors of child abuse all have a story to tell. We all have a prison of silence to break free from. I do not take this gift lightly as I know that so many voices have been silenced forever. So many victims of child abuse throughout the ages whose voices were never heard, the abuse unreported, the silent cries of those children followed them to their graves. It is an honor and privilege to be just "one more voice" for those children and adults whose voices were silenced and I owe it all to Donna and Sandra for allowing my voice to be heard. I hope and pray that you will find your voice, find your freedom, find your peace and find your way in this life if you are struggling. It is my hope that you will never ever ever give up!!! NOT EVER!!! Keep reaching out..keep holding on to hope...keep reaching for help..anyway that you can!!

Keep Holding On to HOPE

Wow..it has been awhile since I last posted an entry on here...I have been very busy..and just trying to find some sort of "organization" in my life...I know that you all know what I'm talking about....I continue to hold on to HOPE in every area of my life, hope that all children's rights advocates will be VICTORIOUS and stop child abuse, hope that all survivor's of child abuse of any kind will finally feel what it's like to love, to know love, to love ourselves, and to love others and to be free from the pain of suffering in childhood. It is a daily walk, a daily trial, a daily tribulation.....and daily...we must hold on to HOPE!! Keep walking my friends, keep looking for that peace in our hearts, in our souls, our spirits! I do believe we will find it!!

Laurie Ann Smith, 'A Life of Death: The Redemption'

Laurie Ann Smith, 'A Life of Death: The Redemption'

My Book is Available Everyone!!!

Wow!! Do I ever have some exciting news!! My book, my story is published and available for purchase! All proceeds from the book are going directly to Dreamcatchers For Abused Children to help in the education, awareness and prevention to stop child abuse! It is my wish, and Dreamcatchers For Abused Children are honoring it and that makes me happy. I do not want money for this book..I want to help save children's lives and help get the word out that child abuse is so so wrong and we need to stop child abuse now! I hope you will pass the word on ....share the link...purchase a copy..and save a child's life!! Bestselling Author and President of Dreamcatchers For Abused Children Donna Kshir saw my blog, read it, and asked me if she could publish my story. I thought that was a nice offer, but could not believe that she was serious. I waited a month or so and thought, hey..how many times does a bestselling author offer to publish a story..?? So, I asked her if she still wanted to publish the book and she said yes and the rest is history. CEO and Founder of Dreamcatchers For Abused Children, and Author Sandra Dawn Potter and Donna Kshir edited the book and left it in my voice. They left the story as I had written it, from my own voice!! How great is that..they literally handed me the key to the locks on the chains to my prison door of silence and allowed my voice to be heard, for this I am eternally grateful. I know that the proceeds from this book will be used to help further the work being done to provide vital services to child abuse victims and survivors everywhere and I am so happy they are allowing me to donate all proceeds to Dreamcatchers For Abused Children! This makes me very happy! Money just cannot buy this kind of happiness or relief to know that many childrens lives will be made better as we continue to fight against child abuse, and fight to get the word out to the public and raise awareness, and educate the public on the issues surrounding child abuse!! Thanks everyone for all your support and mostly for your friendship..it means everything to me...

"A Life of Death: The Redemption" (A True Story) by Laurie Ann Smith is available at Lulu..and soon Amazon and other publishing companies..

http://www.lulu.com/content/paperback-book/a-life-of-death-the-redemption/8500324

Busy, Busy, Busy......

Wow! I have been so busy lately that I have not been on here posting any new blog entries since the middle of February....lots going on...so much in fact that I have a hard time staying organized, perhaps trying to do too much..but I don't want to stop now..I only want to do more...I will have to learn how to get better organized, manage my time, work on things that are time sensitive and then let the other things wait for a more relaxed day..I hope you are all well..I hope that this blog will eventually be a place where people will feel free to post their thoughts, and their ideas and resources, books, other blogs, and poetry, anything that has been a source of comfort in their healing process...I have so much to say and will continue to write here as often as I can. I expect that April will be more about Child Abuse Awareness as it is the National Child Abuse Awareness month this year. I am hoping to get involved and possibly do some public speaking and awareness for Dreamcatchers For Abused Children..so I have to get busy on that to make the connections necessary. So I hope you will feel free to post here and include photos, and other things to really make it your blog as well as mine..and I hope you will just remember to keep reaching out..keep that HOPE alive...stay with it...and a bit of good advice that I need to follow first...make time to just breath..to just relax..to just allow ourselves to look at what is working in our lives and build on it..not rushing past what is helping us to cope but really examining these things and mabey journaling them for future reference...now if I can only get myself to follow that advice!! Take care everyone...
Laurie

Just Keep Holding On and Reaching OUT!!

Hi everyone! I love Fridays!! They make me happy!! It's the day when most of us who work a regular day job at the office begin to feel a sense of freedom coming...a week of busy workloads and just trying to get everything done at work and in our personal lives! It can be a great time to just think about the weekend and the possibility of getting some much needed rest, or just time to read a good book we started and have not finished, or to catch up with friends we haven't seen in a while. For me, it is a time of reflection and a time to spend with my sweetheart who is terminally ill. We always spend at least one day together on the weekend and just enjoy sitting together, cooking dinner and watching a movie or some sports, his favorite thing to do..not mine, or just talk...and for me this weekend brings another chapter in my blog Not So Fond Memories,Growing Up in an Abusive Home, you can read it if you like...it is GRAPHIC and I do warn people to be aware of that before reading it..I am ready to write a new chapter which means looking back on some times in my life that were very dark, and very disturbing to recall, but I do it for the purpose of letting other survivors of child abuse of any kind, that they are not alone and that by me speaking up and sharing my story, they too might know that what happened to them was not their fault and that they did not deserve to be treated the way that they were. None of us do, and none of the children out there right now who are being abused as I write this blog entry deserve to be abused. It is my hope that my personal story will encourage others who have experienced child abuse to reach out to someone, anyone they feel trustworthy and not suffer in silence. My thoughts are with you this weekend! Be safe in all you do!